Dark Sucker Theory

I believe this theory has been around a while, but I am just now getting to understand it:

     For years, it has been believed that electrical bulbs emit light, but recent information has proved otherwise.  Electric bulbs don't emit light; they suck dark.  Thus, we call these bulbs Dark Suckers.

    The basis of the Dark Sucker Theory is that electric bulbs suck dark.  For example, take the Dark Sucker in the room you are in. There is much less dark right next to it than there is elsewhere.  The larger the Dark Sucker, the greater its capacity to suck dark. 

  Once they are full of dark, they can no longer suck.  This is proven by the dark spot on a full Dark Sucker.

    A candle is a primitive Dark Sucker.  A new candle has a white wick. You can see that after the first use, the wick turns black, representing all the dark that has been sucked into it.  If you put a pencil next to the wick of an operating candle, it will turn black.  This is because it got in the way of the dark flowing into the candle.  

    There are also portable Dark Suckers.   When the Dark Storage Unit is full, it must be either emptied or replaced before the portable Dark Sucker can operate again.

   Dark is heavier than light.  If you were to swim just below the surface of the lake, you would see a lot of light.  If you were to slowly swim deeper and deeper, you would notice it getting darker and darker.  When you get really deep, you would be in total darkness.  This is because the heavier dark sinks to the bottom of the lake and the lighter light floats at the top.  The is why it is called light.

    Finally, dark is faster than light.  If you were to stand  in a lit room in front of a closed, dark closet, and slowly opened the closet door, you would see the light slowly enter the closet. But since dark is so fast, you would not be able to see the dark leave the closet.

    Next time you see an electric bulb, remember that it is a Dark Sucker.

This info is stolen from: http://members.dslextreme.com/users/rogermw/darksucker.html