5/15/2009

A glimpse into the male psyche


I finally found an email that explains the way a man thinks and thought I might serve womanhood by sharing it:

Because I'm a man, when I lock my keys in the car, I will fiddle witha coat hanger long after hypothermia has set in. Calling the AA is not an option. I will win.

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Because I'm a man , when the car isn't running very well, I will pop the hood and stare at the engine as if I know what I'm looking at.
If another man shows up, one of us will say to the other, 'I used to be able to fix these things, but now with all these computers and everything, I wouldn't know where to start.' We will then drink a couple of beers and break wind, as a form of holy communion.
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Because I'm a man, when I catch a cold, I need someone to bring me soup and take care of me while I lie in bed and moan. You're a woman. You never get as sick as I do, so for you, this is no problem.
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Because I'm a man, I can be relied upon to purchase basic groceries at the supermarket, like beer, milk or bread. I cannot be expected to find exotic items like tampons, cumin or tofu. For all I know, these are the same thing.
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Because I'm a man, when one of our appliances stops working, I will insist on taking it apart, despite evidence that this will just cost me twice as much once the repair person gets here and has to put it back together.
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Because I'm a man, I must hold the television remote in my hand while I watch TV. If the thing has been misplaced, I may miss a whole show looking for it.....though one time I was able to survive by holding a calculator..... ( applies to engineers especially).
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Because I'm a man, you don't have to ask me if I liked the movie. Chances are, if you're crying at the end of it, I didn't ...and ifyou are feeling amorous afterwards....then I will certainly at least remember the name and recommend it to others.
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Because I'm a man, and this is, after all, the year 2009, I will share equally in the housework. You just do the laundry, the cooking,the cleaning, the vacuuming, and the dishes, and I'll do the rest...... Like wandering around in the garden with a beer wondering what to do.






Need I say more?

6 comments:

Sandra said...

Now, isn't that EXACTLY the truth?!! Ha!

SeeThroughGreen said...

haha! beautuful! You capture the male essence perfectly :D

Ann said...

Two men in my life, my mum's bro and my husband, they would never ask for directions. They would rather drive round and round and round.

Cheers and have a good weekend, hope it is not going to rain on you.

Cheers,

Ann

ladyfi said...

Very very funny! And there is an element of truth in it too.

vicky said...

Neat & funny, couldnt add anything else :)

Eleanor said...

Ha Ha! I really enjoyed that! This week someone sent me a little video clip on the difference between the male and the female brain. In short, the male brain consists of boxes that do not touch each other and which different topics are stored; the female brain is a tangle of wires and they are all linked!

Thank you for your visit!